its 2 am in the morning now,and i just finished watching a walk to remember,after some time actually.its an old movie,but it neva failed to bring tears to my eyes each and everytime,and YES!im tearing as i blog now.ouh wells,at this moment exactly,i feel so much of hope,undying faith and the long journey ahead.I can't see it,but i can feel it.Through all this tears i realise that someday,somewhere,god will show his big plan for me.Ive always thought otherwise,but then again,each time i fall so hard,i noe that something is gonna pick me up sooner or later,like my mum says'if god closes one door,he'll open another'.I noe that this year is an important one for me,and the only way i was going to pick up the pieces,was to excel this year.Sometimes,i think that everyone has someone to hold close and tell them everything thats on your miind,knowing that this one person,will hold you sooo tight and say,he's here.always.
But,then again,for girls like me,who had that the one boy you thought you wld give your all for,walking away..and you'll know he's never coming back.Well,lemme just tell you,its gonna hurt,its gonna tear you apart,its gonna pull all your confidence down,its gonna be on your mind 24/7,its gonna make you think tat you've imperfections,that you're not good enough.You're gonna have to sit and watch him have love in his eyes,when all you can do is just sit there and be numb,cause you noe that nothing you say or do will change anything.I've been through this more than a million times,and everysingle time i get up and walk like it did'nt hurt one bit,like i had no feelings at all,like i had a smile plastered on my face,like i had to lie to myself everyday.Then one day you get up,sick of crying cos other ppl thought you're not good enough,and its at that moment you'll realise,that it doesnt matter,it never did,and never will! cos every chapter has an ending.
wheather you like it or not.
good night.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY VIMAL AND CASSY.
god bless!
I write sins,not tragedies.
2:03 AM
